Script
All we really need is some good business Jargon that will make it even funnier that these kids are the Long Term Investments they were talking about through the short. Try to think of anything that won't give it away but will make it funny. Things like how they will have to sacrifice almost all of their free time for a very long time. I think this will be a lot funnier if before they reveal that they are talking about kids the audience is thinking, this is the worst investment ever!
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Maybe we can even have the husband and wife ask "So what's to gain" and then the business man could reply "People do say there are many rewards (awkward pause), you just don't see any here (further awkward pause)"
I know we haven't work on any of this so here is something I quickly made up...
(fade into dining room w/ background of kids playing in living room)
Wife: It's just so expensive keeping such an investment. You never realize until you look at our cash flow next to the cost.
Husband: Honestly, I'd rather just give it up and take the penalties. Then again, I wonder if leasing is an option?
Wife: That's a good point. Is leasing an option?
Investor: The price sensitive of this type of leasing is sort of the same as a corporate bond. You have basis point changes with option adjusted spreads that affect the amount of cash flow recieved by the option holder. In this case, you.
Husband: What happens if there is a return requested by the option holder?
Investor: As an experienced corporate bond option investor that deals with long position decisions all the time. I've even seen my father in the 80's do this frequently from the safety of his desk without breaking a sweat. Execution of such a leasing that would alter to a return on the investment will not change the market price over time due to new financial laws that were legalized two years ago by the Bush administration.
Wife: Are there any tax benefits?
Investor: Sadly, there really isn't any.
Husband: Well... (Husband and Wife looks at each other) alright then.
(All three get up and go to the living room where the kids are playing.)
Husband: Good news kids! Me and your mom have finally decided to keep you!
(Kids stop playing and look shocked)
Husband: (Giving two thumbs up in the air.) Yes!
(fade out)
Change
Husband: What happens if there is a return requested by the option holder?
Husband: What happens if there is a return request by a future option holder?
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